Pregnancy Etiquette: welcome words and deeds.

Since we all now know what to avoid, I thought I would make a list of all the things that are completely delightful and wonderful concerning women who are with child.

Welcome Words:

1. Congratulate- Please, go ahead and say "Congratulations", keep it simple and genuine. Frankly, if all those blunt and rude comments were followed by a heartfelt "congratulations", it would go a long way to easing the awkwardness.

2. If the family has other children, it is perfectly acceptable to mention their previous children's adorableness and then state "I am sure this child will be as equally adorable" or something to that effect.

3. "We are very excited for your family!"

4. "You will make an excellent mother."

5. Instead of asking if it is a boy or girl, ask if they will or have discovered the sex of the baby. This way there is no need to guess the gestational age of the baby. If they have, by all means, ask which it is and then be excited for them, even if it is their sixth girl!

6. "When are you due? (ask only after a several confirmations of an actual pregnancy!) and then comment on the time of year, not the length of time left. "O, a holiday baby! What a wonderful gift for your family." "August is such a hot month, but you are one tough lady, I am sure it won't phase you!"

7. Wish her a healthy pregnancy!

Welcome Deeds:

1. Dinner (check for allergies or picky palettes) When I was pregnant with my third child, a close friend surprised me with dinner and a plate of cookies. After she left, I went into my kitchen and cried. I just didn't have dinner prep in me that day and I was obviously emotionally grateful for her efforts. (ps, Kendra- Dinner was fantastic! All three kids loved it. Thank you so very much)

2. Fresh bread

3. Fresh vegetables from your garden

4. A simple card of congratulations

6. Babysitting for OB appointments

7. Offering of left over baby items- With my first pregnancy, one of the physicians I worked with gave us a portable high chair, a small play gym and a baby bath tub. We were on a tiny, almost invisible budget and having one less thing to purchase was a welcome relief. Make sure items are clean and still usable. (with no recalls!)

8. Providing small distraction activities for her other children. Personally, it's not being pregnant that is so hard, it is being pregnant and being a "mommy" that is hard.

9. Offering to Pick-up or Drop-off other children from their various activities.